Category Archives: Business

The fine art of listening: Please, hear me out!

Have you ever found yourself distracted from listening? Perhaps some precarious things happened.

Maybe you can relate to this. Some neighborhood kids came by to see if you want to enroll your pooch in the “Doggie Day Spa.” It’s not until later that you realize you said yes to much more than a simple bath and brush out. The rush to get back to completing a task kept you from the art of listening. Instead you’re enjoying some post modern art on your pooch.

Shih Tzu with purple mohawk, 2 years old, sitting in front of white background

Next time those entrepreneurial kids come knocking at your door and Rover is stinky, you’ll make sure to listen closely to what each spa package offers.

Perhaps you can identify with this one. At the Dry Cleaners you realize that your favorite duds have shrunk three sizes. As you flashback to an odd conversation including hot water and stain removers, you realize something went wildly awry in the listening and communication department.

In search of being my best human self, a better entrepreneur, friend and family member, I’ve been stewing over the ways in which we can improve our listening skills. We’ve all experienced something like this because we’re human and yet I think this topic is worthwhile.

Just recently I was humbled as I became lost en route to an important appointment. Yes, I was busted for not listening as I should. Despite being given great directions, I thought to myself, no worries. I’ll simply rely on the GPS for a friendly fallback. Doh!  Well guess what? This place was off the grid. Because I hadn’t listened intently, I found myself driving around in circles in frustration. Of course, now I’m turning it into fodder because if my human frailty can assist you in anyway, I’m happy to assist!

Listening is much deeper than hearing.

The best business happens when the needs, wants and desires are met– when customers feel heard. The same holds true in our relationships.

Listening is about staying alert to what’s going on and to what matters not only to us, but those we serve.

Listening requires processing. Sometimes that processing includes the emotions of those to whom we are listening and those to whom we are communicating.

Communication train wrecks occur when we’re in a hurry to be heard instead of hearing out what’s happening. Often they are linked to what I call the “tyranny of urgency.” We get ourselves in a hurry to accomplish so much that we miss out on crucial conversations and observations that had we paused long enough– we would have gleaned valuable information to propel a mutual agenda forward.

To increase our artistry in listening, let’s ask ourselves the following questions:

  • Do I listen to others the way I want to be listened to?
  • Am I marketing an idea or am I helping someone overcome a specific problem?
  • Am I adding value in this communication interchange?

Listening is a gift we give. Being heard is what we most crave. Most of us are done with being a number. We want interaction that’s not superficial. We desire to be understood.

Chime in. We’re all ears! 😉

Art of Listening- Dr. Paige Hunter

In the comments below please share the last time you were the recipient or giver in the art of listening? What was it like to be heard or to listen to someone intently? What did this experience do for you and /or your fellow human? Tell us about it!

 

How to Avoid Burnout & Hit Your Goals

Isn’t it amazing that as soon as we make our mind up to pursue a goal it’s as if a special anthem begins to play? Game face on, check! Perhaps you hear Rocky Balboa’s theme song or We are the Champions, my friend! Or is this just me? We’ve got heart. Determination. Integrity. We’re taking that goal! And, POOF! An obstacle or two arises. No. big. deal. We’ve got this! A hurdle is jumped and we’re still on track. Defeat is not an option. It’s decided. There will be no burn out in hitting goals!

Alas, another ugly obstacle rears up as a challenge! We will not be deterred! We boldy speak forth, “ain’t nobody got time for that!” while courageously  pursuing the goal. By now, you know where this is going because life doles out plenty of surprises while in the pursuit of happiness.

overcome obstacles and avoid burnout

And so the journey continues. We choose to move along focused on our goal yet obstacles continue to pop up everywhere! It’s almost like a conspiracy!

We’ve all been there! Perhaps you can identify with one of the following examples. Set a health goal to slim down? It’s ridiculous how many cookies and cakes begin passing before our very eyes! Set a financial goal to save up for a special purchase or chase away some debt? We get a call from a friend desperate in need or the car needs serious repairs. But wait, there’s more! Entrepreneurs, you set a lofty, yet attainable business goal when the next day you receive a call from your bank explaining that there’s been some fraud committed through your account. Setbacks happen. Am I right?

Focus on why you set the goal in the first place.

List the reasons you decided to set this specific goal. Is this a goal you’re doing for someone else or was is it your desire? If it’s an easy goal to quit, perhaps it’s not one that you are ready to take on alone. Do you need help from an individual who can coach you in getting there? List any obstacles that may occur might occur along the way? How can you overcome them? Write down, how things will be should you not hit this specific goal. What will it cost you in every area of your life? Will it be more unresolved stress? Poor health? Time away from those you care about? Take time to pinpoint what you want to create by achieving this goal and what you want to avoid.

Begin with the end in mind.

Place in writing how you will feel upon completing this goal and what you will do to celebrate it. For example, if it’s a financial goal, it may look like this. “Today I paid off the mortgage and it feels so liberating! I’m proud of myself for being disciplined and staying true to what matters most. I’m choosing to celebrate by taking the family to Lake Tahoe. We’ll celebrate in style with a hot air balloon ride.” When we set a goal, let’s be prepared to hit it as well as celebrate it.

overcome obstacles and avoid burnout

Track the results

Have a visible tracker to mark results. It can be done using a computer program or something simple that is drawn up. Below is an example.

avoid burnout while achieving your goals

The purpose is to have a reference guide that empowers us to see daily, weekly or monthly progress (or the lack thereof so we can recalibrate our strategy). This helps us as goal setters get back on track if we’ve wanderer off or to stay in the race for goal completion. Whether it’s something like a health, business or financial goal a visual indicator with a baseline and projected goals serves mightily in cultivating the habits and practices necessary to reach goals and avoid burnout.

Your turn, please

Tell us in the comment area below, have you used any of these tactics before to hit a goal? What goal did you hit or how did you celebrate its completion? Any tips can you share with us about avoiding burnout while completing a goal? We’ve got plans to do great things! 🙂

 

10 Quick Mood Boosters to Brighten Your Day

Ever find yourself in a funk? Perhaps you snapped at the love of your life? The kids? Maybe it was even the clerk at the supermarket? It’s the odd feeling of funk. And by funk I mean you feel discombobulated, blue, upset or anxiousness and it seems for no plausible reason. Ugh! No worries though. Here’s 10 quick mood boosters to raise your spirits and brighten your day. Yay!

1. Go walking on sunshine, whoooooaaa.

You know Katrina and the Waves made the song popular because it’s true. It really resonates. And if by chance the sun is not out where you are at the moment a little exercise always lifts the spirits. Of course, if you have sunshine sneak in the vitamin D for extra mood-boosting powers. And if you have a broken leg, no worries, I have something for you. Link to song.

Sunshine Walk

2. Plant or buy for indoor enjoyment a brightly colored kalanchoe plant.

You get a variety of choices– yellow, red, magenta, orange, hot and light pink and white. Don’t have a green thumb? It’s okay. I assure you. I’m a bit challenged in the plant longevity department and I’ve managed to enjoy the cheery flowering plants for sometime. (True confession: I actually googled “hard to kill flowers/plants. So this research is legit.)

flower

3. Declutter a small space.

The focus here to accomplish something that will give instant gratification and thus a quick mood boost. If you are OCD and have everything perfectly in order already. I admire you. Simply skip over this suggestion or come help me. 😉 The rest of us can put things in order so we feel the benefit of clearing out papers, unpaired socks, or unfixed gadgets that don’t serve us leaving us a happy as a pig in mud.

4. Meet a friend or friends for tea time or a cup of java.

Even the most remote of introverts at their deepest levels crave connection. Having a nice conversation, sharing some ideas and laughter never hurt anyone. Whose to say that a little caffeine from some coffee or delicious green tea can’t add to boosting your mood and brightening your day?

 

Group of women talking over a cup of coffee

5. Send a positive text or email to an unsuspecting person.

Maybe it’s a client or someone you have done business with recently. Let them know what makes them valuable in the world or to you. Perhaps send a picture of something they helped bring value to you. I can assure you that on the receiving end it’s heartwarming. Just two quick shares. From a health coaching client I received two texts one was a before and after picture of her 22 pound weight loss. The other picture showcased some deliciously prepared food with a simple “Thanks! I haven’t eaten or felt this good since my 20s.”  Squeal! From a business client I received these words in an email “since we last worked together my monthly income has increased by $600.” Again, warm fuzzies and squeals of joy. I assure you that both sending and receiving feels great!

6. Call your most inspirational or funny friend.

See what’s new and good in their life. I have this friend Shelly. She seriously has the most wildly ridiculous circumstances that come up in her life that put me in stitches. She’s also a philanthropic ninja always defending the defenseless. If I want an immediate lift, I reach out and see what’s going on in the wacky and wonderful world of Shelly. She not only makes me laugh, she reminds me of how precious this life is and how we are here to serve and make a difference in this wonderful world.

call

7. Enjoy a small piece of dark chocolate.

Yes, I said that. A small piece of dark chocolate is full of antioxidants, it contains compounds that influence our levels of serotonin. So what do you need to know about serotonin? That this brain chemical is the feel good chemical. So go ahead and indulge a little. 🙂

Choco

8. Unwind in a hot bath.

A long time personal favorite. I like to set the stage. A little Jazz music from Miles Davis. Some lavender or vanilla essential oils added to the bath salts and a little slice of Heaven is created. Stress melts away and I’m so. good. to. go. I strongly recommend this for your personal self-care practice and mood boost repertoire.

Rubberducky

9. Elevate with gratitude.

Pull yourself away from a funk by focusing on giving thanks. Focus less on the problem, more on creating a solution and by all means count your blessings. There’s so much to be grateful for and placing this as a daily practice helps ensure that we don’t get sucked down the grouch rabbit-trail of funk. Drum up one thing you are thankful for and relish it! It’s a quick mood booster. Pinky promise.

Gratitude

10. Snuggle with four-legged friends.

While puppies and kittens are high on the chart grown critters and farm animals will also do! There’s lots of supporting evidence that petting animals reduces stress, anxiety or boosts our mood.

Puppies

Share with us!

In the comments below, tell us– Do you have any quick go to mood boosters? OR– what’s your next plan to defer to when you need to add a little sunshine to your life?

How taking one action can alter everything…

and 5 simple steps to uncover it

I’ll never forget the day I wanted to yank my hair out and ask for a refund. It seemed overly simplistic. We were teamed up and tasked to pinpoint the one action that can alter everything. Or rather, come face-to-face with, “what’s stopping me from being my best?” If I could capture this, then I could identify the one action that substantially creates progress in my life.

B-I-N-G-O!

She got it. She really got it. Me, not so much.

Allow me to explain. Ten years ago I was attending a leadership conference when Sally (not her real name of course) and I were paired up as each others’  “camp buddy.”

During an outside break, we were to share what the one action we’d take over the next 6 weeks to reach new goals. Sally’s eyes filled up with big crocodile tears. With deep conviction she said,  “I know what I’m supposed to do. From now on I’m going to set my alarm for 7:00 a.m. and that’s it. This will transform everything. It’s decided.”

I was surprised and queried, “So it’s decided?”

I thought,  “So an alarm for 7:00, huh? Why not 6:52 or 7:03?” Sally had clearly set her intention and I felt it my duty to support her. Still befuddled by her conclusion I wondered how setting an alarm clock could seriously be the one action that accelerates results.

alarm-clock-758727_1280

In spite of my disdain for annoying alarm clocks, something snapped and I understood what she meant. Of course, this epiphany happened when Sally explained a simple five-step strategy that uncovered the one action that we could take to power through to our goals.

1) Identify the lie/s.

2) Slam the door on excuses.

3) Poof! The one life-altering action appears!

4) Tell it, do it, and walk with accountability.

5) Celebrate the results.

This was not Sally’s first rodeo! (not literally, that’s Texan for she’s no novice) She was on a mission. I asked her to elaborate so I too could move past anything stopping me. Sally confided that she was re-auditing the leadership course because it had proven to be super beneficial. She explained where her mental condition had been a few years back as she walked me through the five steps that can propel us to that one trigger action that creates a lasting domino effect.

First, Sally exposed the lies. She believed she could never be a healthy size 8 again. She believed she didn’t have time to take care of herself by preparing nutritious meals or working out 3-4 times a week. Sally explained that the feeling of overwhelm and fitting into a size 16 left her stuck in the mud.

Second, she decided to slam the door on the excuses and devise a plan instead. Sally realized she made choices based solely on convenience rather than substance. She took charge, reached out to a neighbor friend for support. Together they agreed to start walking 3 times a week for 45 minutes. Sally also chose to shop for groceries on Friday so she could plan out and prepare meals during the weekend. These two choices really helped her get after two of her biggest excuses.

Third, Sally took on her one big action she KNEW would change everything. She pinpointed where things had gone awry. She recognized that shortly after her best friend’s fatal car accident she fell victim to sugar and processed carbs. It was understandable. Sugar had become her solace and comfort. Sally shared that it too, had also be her “socially-acceptable crack”. A radical choice to cut out sugar from her diet all together ensued. She was convinced this one action would give her the freedom she wanted– and it did.

Fourth, Sally told her immediate family and close circle of friends what she was up to. She did so to receive support, and frankly, there were times that she was challenged by friendly sabotage. However, there were those who rallied around her efforts, inciting accountability.

Fifth, when Sally hit her goal she booked a weekend getaway to the beach with her husband. She commissioned him to help her pick out two great outfits; one for a special dinner and another for pictures that would be taken to celebrate their upcoming 10-year anniversary. She took this opportunity to whip out her cell phone and show me her favorite photos of that day.

couple-789824_1280

Sally’s one decision brought about desired results of health and confidence. What’s more is that this one decision to nix sugar and processed carbs brought about a tremendous friendship with her walking partner. The results didn’t stop there. She shared with me that her marriage had vastly improved because she no longer craved what made her body feel bad. Instead, she chose to work on the deeper issues and in time, new patterns of health, acceptance and joy took the once dark place.

I’m about to reconnect with Sally on a monthly call. I look forward to hearing how setting an alarm at 7:00 a.m. continues to drastically transform her life.

While I’m still not a fan of alarm clocks, I did decide one the one action I’d take to change everything. I chose to give up my night owl status. Now my one action of hitting the hay earlier is making all the difference in the world. Who knew? Bedtime at 10:30 sets my world in motion, my mind at ease and my goals on the fast track.

Over to you!

Are you up to taking that one action that can create the remarkable results you crave as an entrepreneur or health adventurer? If so, tell us in the comments below. We’ll be happy to cheer you on as you pick up more lift!

The Play of Work

Have you ever watched the sheer joy of children playing as if it’s serious work? Please, allow me to share the wisdom of Fernando. He’s my favorite three-year old.

While visiting he and his family this past weekend, we played. And we took our play quite seriously.

Fernando announced with such fervor, “I’m a pirate!” He pulled out a pretend sword. At that moment, I pulled out my sword, squinted my ears, grit my teeth, and let out my best “ARRRRR.”

The-play-of-work
The-play-of-work

We fought for a good while. After sharpening our fighting skills, shouting out powerful declarations, and strengthening our relationship via knuckle bumps, laughter and other sparing activity, I had a realization.

I want to share the play of work realization with you.

Playing isn’t just for kids. The best work environments include sharpening our skills­– be it writing, speaking, selling, creating, delivering. It’s all part of the show.

How we go about making it enjoyable will keep us in the game longer, stronger and refreshed.

The “I am” Declaration

Play at work can be profound. Simply declaring, “I am a pirate!” is layered with greatness. Fernando wasn’t fooling around. He was meant business! His declaring wasn’t “I’m going to pretend to be a pirate.” That little guy was serious. as he powerfully declared to me who he was. The same is applicable to us, when we declare I am (you fill in the blank) it’s like a confident call out to our customers/clients, our audience.

Fernando’s firm declaration calls for, what marketers describe as “buy in”. Yep, I bought into him being a pirate. I did not shrink back as a damsel to be captured or stolen from, I decided to show up as a fellow pirate too!

Think about it. Children are incredible teachers when it comes to declaration. They aren’t holding back.

I am a fireman! (chest pounding and muscle flexing serving as non-verbal cues)

I am a ballerina! (complete with twirling, smiles and pirouette)

If you’re wondering why I’m discussing this– it’s all about the importance of “owning” what feels right. Let me explain, today I was on a business call when an interesting discussion arose.

As I listened, I detected that the person with whom I was speaking was conflicted around what to do next. She explained there was so much that she could do to rake in money, however, what she wanted to do was something different.

The more experience we gain, the more we may take on different hats or abilities. However, specific actions don’t make up who we are.

We dug further.

Specific themes throughout her life left behind bread crumbs leading up to her “I am” declaration. In every scenario she was helping people. designing programs, or collaborating with others to gain more traction. Ultimately, her passion was helping create results.Yet as she spoke there was some lackluster until she owned it.

“I’m a coach” she said with child-like animation. An excitement and deep-seated joy surfaced. I’m convinced that had we not been miles apart, I’m sure she would have picked up a sword and we’d start swinging.

In a world brimming with flakes and fakes, standing up and declaring “I’m a coach” can be intimidating when it’s no secret that “coaching” can be a catch-all title for talkers, or something perceived as artificial. I know because I too, battled with this very title.

Sure I can declare, “I am an educator.” It’s true, I am. I can declare I am an entrepreneur. This is 100% true.

Yet at my very core, I am a coach. I’m good at guiding others and myself to that next level of breakthrough. I want those who cross my path to experience financial freedom through business. I want my customers to feel healthy and happy in their body. So yes, I can declare a lot of things, but at the end of the day I am a coach. I listen, encourage, and create “plans of attack” for successful business or improved health. I even throw out challenges and question the status quo. In short, I’m out to collaborate for the win.

Team meeting

So it was no coincidence that the “coach” topic surfaced and our paths had crossed. Furthermore, it’s no surprise I am a sword-fighting pirate too. 😉

You’ve heard, “all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” It screams out permission to play! Don’t you just love it? Oh sweet permission!

Hear me please. If Jack doesn’t take time off to refuel and restore, Jack becomes bored and boring. Now let’s take it a step further, let’s not be Jack! Instead, let’s ask, how can play be incorporated into our own life regarding work? Write it down. Shout it from the roof tops! Share it with this lovable online community.

Do you play?

The more we give our self permission to enjoy life; we set an admirable example for others. Let’s play inside of our work– to avoid  burnout and to promote attractiveness. Yes, let’s make what we do “sexy”. Wink, wink.

When we enjoy what we do others take notice and usually join in. I’m a firm believer that we can be professional pirates tossing out a knuckle bump and while enjoying swashbuckling working relationships while simply building more positive memories.

Talk to me. In the comments below, share with me an “I am” statement or something playful you do or plan to do inside of your work? This inquiring mind wants and needs to know. 🙂