Tag Archives: how to design a fulfilled life

6 Tips to Overcome Overwhelm this December

Poor December. It seems to be the month that gets a bad wrap. Somehow it’s become notorious for rushing, Falalalalaling (yes, that’s a word), the onslaught of cold and flu season, overindulgence in every sense of the word- not to mention the year drawing to a close.

You friend, may not 100% immune to overwhelm. However, I’ve got ten tips to help you insulate yourself from demanding schedules and the seasonal fuss.

1- Eat and drink for healthy merriment.

I refuse to play “food Nazi” role. I believe celebrations call for special foods and drink. This being established, let me level with you. If you are invited to a White Elephant gift exchange party, it’s highly likely there’s going to be a lot of sugar and processed foods (think melted cheese dip). And, seriously, since you’re so likable, you won’t just attend one party, you’ll attend four or more and probably host one of your own.

So here’s my point– enjoy a little party food; just go in prepared like a paratrooper not a party pooper. Go in having nourished your incredible machine with lots of servings of fiber and Vitamin C. Give your body a little digestion vacay by drinking some delicious protein shakes before joining your tribe. And by all means­– don’t forget the water. Push the water to flush out toxins. If you really want to be on top of the game, why not savor some love tea?

2- Communicate freely, listen deeply.

Often we’ll find ourselves in overwhelm because we aren’t sharing our intentions clearly with those we love. Take time to communicate what’s going on with you. Especially share where you feel you are having to skate around circumstances that are a bit tricky. Then say “ah” or “a-ah”.

Take some time to listen intently to those around you. What stories are they sharing? What is it they are overcoming? Are they stressed out? Peaceful? What can you learn? How can you affirm them? The process of listening is empowering. Make it something that helps you become more centered­– simply by staying present.

3- Make time each day for a “fill up”.

How do you get a “fill up?” Do you take a prayer walk? Do you snuggle with your favorite person or critter? Do you read something inspiring while sipping your favorite beverage?

During the hustle and bustle, take that special time for you. Running on fumes is no fun. Keep a full tank so you can continue humming along with joy and intention.

4- Ditch perfection and have a laugh instead.

This past Thanksgiving I tenderly handcrafted a scrumptious gluten free pumpkin pie with an irresistible ginger snap crust. It was the mother of all pumpkin pies!

When the timer chimed I asked my husband to take it out of the oven because I was busy prepping other food. Before he even opened the oven, he asked, “Why are you baking this at 450 degrees?” And then I knew. It was burned. Yep, 100 degrees over what it should have been. Lesson learned. Always double-check the temperature. Always. 🙂

I had a decision to make. Cry or laugh. I seized the opportunity to realize my humanness, yet again. My husband took pity on me and I got a big bear hug and we laughed together. Our “perfect“ Thanksgiving dinner could not be ruined by imperfection.

I’m telling on myself because I found that majoring on a minor thing can be overwhelming. It’s much healthier to have a good laugh and move on.

5- Play the Gratitude Sandwich Game

Think of the problem and solution being like two pieces of bread. Then sneak in some gratitude and there you have it. A sandwich to sustain your perspective. Time spent in developing countries with opportunities to volunteer or work has gifted beyond measure. I call this gift the “gratitude sandwich”.

Here’s how we play it. Slow Internet? No worries. I’m grateful to own a computer which means I’m literate. Life is good.

Bland dinner? Thank you God I have food to eat. I am not the statistic of being one in every eight people on Earth going to bed hungry each night.

Forgot to brush your teeth as you bolted out the door this morning? No worries. I give thanks. Your bad breath is better than no breath at all.

See, isn’t that better? Gratitude sandwiches seem to solve a lot of “problems.”

Gratitude

6- Prioritize and stick to it!

Having priorities is like having an oxygen tank when deep sea diving. It’s a life necessity. Think about your priorities. Are you giving your top five priorities  the time and attention needed to avoid feeling incongruent?

We’ve all seen or heard it. A public announcement is made during a wedding ceremony. For better or worse. And somehow within a few years something is unraveled and poof the relationship is dissolved.

Let’s not be the ones for example who say, “my priorities are God, family, work” and then be the one who turns into a workaholic forgetting to stand, sit and snuggle alongside our favorite human. Instead when we sense overwhelm coming on, let’s remember what matters most and stick to our guns (and no, that was not a subliminal push for the NRA, duct tape or crazy glue).

Talk to me in the comments below. Any tips you want to share in how you handle overwhelm. We want to know! Or, are you planning on using one of these six tips this December? If so, tell me about it.

Happiness, Success, and Motivation: 3 Tips for Designing a Fulfilled Life

This past weekend I participated in three hours of top notch personal and business training with the world-renown, Tony Robbins. The first 90 minutes was open to approximately 10,000 people. The second half was an exclusive luncheon where more in-depth training on designing a fulfilled life was awarded to a select few. I was grateful to be there and wanted to bring others along for a possible “fire walk” across coals.

Tony Robbins
Tony Robbins

Although the fire walk didn’t happen, I was fastidiously “smoking” notes so I could share this information with as many as I can.

Below are the three most meaty pieces of wisdom I gleaned from that special day. I’m sharing with you because I’m sure it will resonate.

Here’s three “Tony” tips for designing a fulfilled life:

Progress = Happiness

So true! Ever complete a big project and feel like happy dancing? How about reaching your goal weight? Getting the grocery shopping done so you can share a special meal with those you love? Progress is made and enjoyed on small and large scales. Let’s not underestimated this, shall we?

Here’s my happiness increase plan for the day. The smalls. Unpack my suitcase. Juice my favorite recipe. Send out a special email announcing my first online course for Entrepreneurs. And now, for the bigs. Wait a minute. Hold ‘yer horses. That last one was big! It’s been a dream that’s now taking flight. Happy dance! Woot! Woot! AND it’s not just that, but the fact I’m getting three loads of laundry done! Yes!

Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure

That’s seriously good food for thought. How is that so many people hold positions where they make “big bank” but are bored silly or hate what they do? Has this been you or someone you know? Or how about that someone who leaves behind a high paying position to pursue what really fills them up and give them the chance to create what they crave? Perhaps they are hungry for more family time? Less commute? More creativity? Perhaps they wanted less stress? Whatever the reasons, they left a position that most would deem “successful” to avoid feeling a failure. Satisfaction was missing and a change was made.

Maybe you can relate to either end of this spectrum.

Ultimately, I wish you fulfillment while you succeed.

It’s comfort zones we need to avoid, isn’t it? When we desire something beyond the status quo we need to rise up and live completely, fully. This leads me to the next insight gained from Mr. Robbins when he was asked how he helps others overcome fear without experiencing the fire walk. He summarized it by addressing what motivates us.

Fear, Incentives, and Growth

There’s three types of motivation; fear, incentives and growth.

The most effective is growth.

Think about it, as a child you may have been threatened to wash the dishes or else a privilege would be revoked. The fear of losing a privilege created action. Dishes cleaned! It was the motivation we needed so we could play, watch cartoons, or watch movies at a friend’s house. This motivating fear was effective leverage. Long-term fear is not the best motivator, and yet clearly we understand that it can be practical.

Incentives provide a warm, fuzzy feeling type of motivation. I personally like incentives. As a kid I’d rush to make my bed just to hear the praises of my mother. As an adult, I’ve fallen in love with experiences and travel. I’ve been known to work harder for award trips to places like Bora Bora or Switzerland than earning an extra $400,000 (not that I am opposed to either).

When we discover what incentives motivate, we can support others in maximizing effectiveness in action. While incentives can be great for a season, there may come a time one is so saturated with “awards” like world travel that they hunger for something more, something deeper.

This type of motivation that drives us is growth! For the long-term and a deep sense of satisfaction, growth is considered the most effective motivation because it makes us FEEL ALIVE! I 100% whole-heartedly agree!

Don’t we feel the most alive when we can grow as a person and help others grow and transform their own lives?

It’s no wonder that great leaders are servants.

And those who are real standouts are sold out to the idea of serving others. They go beyond simple presentation of an idea or product. They want to leave the world a better place.

There you have it friends, insider wisdom from my lunch spent with Tony Robbins. I hope you find it beneficial. I know I did. Oh, by the way, I bet you are happier now, as you’ve made progress simply by reading this article. Celebrate it. And here’s to you having more fulfilling successes!

Join me in the conversation.

Share in the comments below what things most motivate you nowadays? Or dish out what progress you’ve made lately that brings happiness?