Category Archives: Personal Growth

How I Stopped Talking and Started Doing

Ever find yourself sitting on the sidelines of life?

That was me about three years ago. Don’t get me wrong. I was in a very good place. We had paid off our home on 28 acres, I was enjoying my life and work, but there still something felt off. It was a cold December and CHF was hosting a special dinner and fundraiser. Speakers from all over flew in to share how hard earned dollars are spent to make a lasting difference.

That night I learned from a powerful woman how CHF played an integral part in helping their mission of rescuing children from human trafficking in Thailand. As I listened I knew this would also play a part in my life mission.

Her words hit the bull’s-eye of my heart. I wept. I rejoiced because there are courageous people who live with such compassion and vision.

I believe we’re given moments when we catch a glimpse or flash into our future. It resonates with our core on such a deep level we can’t even explain it. This was that kind of moment. Sometimes those glimpses and flashes of insights filter down through deep desires we don’t fully know how to articulate – yet.

Here’s what I mean. I always wanted to be a cross between a “world traveling social entrepreneur” and a “Wild West Outdoorswoman”. I know it’s sounds funny, right? Go ahead and laugh. It makes me laugh too. You do understand that holding a PhD gives me the liberty to pontificate such professional creativity. And yes, it’s completely en vogue to do what you enjoy doing. I just happen to love teaching health and entrepreneurship. I hope you love what you do too! If not, send word. Write in the subject line: SOS. 🙂

Of course, it would be easier if I straddled two simple categories like Computer Engineer and Exotic Coin Collector. Oh and on a very serious note, I’m going to run with the title “world traveling Social Entrepreneur” and “Wild West Outdoorswoman” no matter how delightfully odd it seems. Why should we live within self-constraining limits?

If Martha Stewart can hold the titles of convicted felon and DIY food & home decorating maven, then I most certainly have wiggle room. Right?

It excites me to know the world offers up opportunities we’re willing to work for! It may not come on a platter but given time, planning and action we can create a life we love.

I’m living proof that you can rise from a mountain of financial debt and physical woes and embrace financial liberation and a healthy body. Yes! You can gallivant the globe and enjoy your own backyard. Everyone else’s story is NOT your story.

This leads me to the next developments of my story. A little over twelve months I carefully crafted a list of work, play and contribution ideas I wanted to tackle in 2014. One included a rescheduled horse trip to South Dakota. The other included an upcoming trip to Thailand the end of THIS month. Super Yay! And, eeeeeek this is really happening!

Here’s the secret. It’s all in the decision we make.

I decided. Pure and simple. It’s when I stopped talking and started doing. The “doing” didn’t really feel like I was doing so much as it was making baby steps to achieve the bigger goals. Sometimes it was a mind shift. Other times, it was planning and action and more planning and action.

It’s one thing to make a list and talk about it. It’s life changing to actually do something about it.

It’s as if we’re all sailboats out to sea. The decisions we make guide the direction of our sails. Along the way we may sail a bit off course. That’s where much of the adventure lies. Decision-making defines our future.

When we decide to stop talking and start doing we’ll find we can live inside of our dreams.

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Making a specific decision helped me stop talking and start doing.

You see up to that point I was okay with thinking or talking about how and who I wanted to be and become. It wasn’t until I made the decision to ride in the mountains nonstop for days on end that the other wonderful circumstances began to happen.

The unexpected part of this decision brought on a fantastical adventure. My enthusiasm even got the buy in and encouragement from many. My husband supported me in this goal. Dear Mexican business friends supported me. It felt incredible because the only way to reach this goal was to obtain hours in the saddle. And so it became a fairy-tale like Wild West adventure.

I rode new trails with my husband and friends around the mountains, old haciendas, and sugar cane fields. This of course, fed into my Wild West theme. It’s as if the world was conspiring with me to enjoy the trip of a lifetime. Mostly I try to contain my joy unspeakable because I couldn’t explain why it’s meant so much –but that’s perhaps for another time or when my new webdesign and copy comes out.
How to get the motivation to stop talking and start doing.

Here’s the point, I rode four days with my friend, Liz who happens to be the female version of John Wayne. We rode hours at a time breathing in the beauty, soaking up the visual feast of Fall’s foliage, and sounds of babbling brooks. On the last day, we rode up to Mount Rushmore weaving in and out of the mountains’ fallen trees. I’m grateful for the moments when God brings schedules, weather and family timing together so life can be thoroughly enjoyed– outdoors…on the back of a horse.

I benefitted so much from taking the South Dakota riding trip in ways I am still counting. It taught me that making a powerful a decision can provide endless possibilities. It grew the courage I needed to say yes to this upcoming “Wild East” adventure.

And now I look forward to sharing with you what the next decision offers up. How working, playing and contributing while I’m on the road expands new horizons and nourishes my desire to hold up to the world traveling social entrepreneur title. I’ll be sharing some insights with you as I continue to do that which I’ve only talked about and am now seizing.

Enough about me, how about you? Tell me in the comments below, has there been a decision you’ve made that really set things in motion for you?

Is there a decision you realized you need to make now so you can stop talking and start doing?

Share with us!

Happiness, Success, and Motivation: 3 Tips for Designing a Fulfilled Life

This past weekend I participated in three hours of top notch personal and business training with the world-renown, Tony Robbins. The first 90 minutes was open to approximately 10,000 people. The second half was an exclusive luncheon where more in-depth training on designing a fulfilled life was awarded to a select few. I was grateful to be there and wanted to bring others along for a possible “fire walk” across coals.

Tony Robbins
Tony Robbins

Although the fire walk didn’t happen, I was fastidiously “smoking” notes so I could share this information with as many as I can.

Below are the three most meaty pieces of wisdom I gleaned from that special day. I’m sharing with you because I’m sure it will resonate.

Here’s three “Tony” tips for designing a fulfilled life:

Progress = Happiness

So true! Ever complete a big project and feel like happy dancing? How about reaching your goal weight? Getting the grocery shopping done so you can share a special meal with those you love? Progress is made and enjoyed on small and large scales. Let’s not underestimated this, shall we?

How are you going to increase your happiness today?

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Here’s my happiness increase plan for the day. The smalls. Unpack my suitcase. Juice my favorite recipe. Send out a special email announcing my first online course for Entrepreneurs. And now, for the bigs. Wait a minute. Hold ‘yer horses. That last one was big! It’s been a dream that’s now taking flight. Happy dance! Woot! Woot! AND it’s not just that, but the fact I’m getting three loads of laundry done! Yes!

Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure

That’s seriously good food for thought. How is that so many people hold positions where they make “big bank” but are bored silly or hate what they do? Has this been you or someone you know? Or how about that someone who leaves behind a high paying position to pursue what really fills them up and give them the chance to create what they crave? Perhaps they are hungry for more family time? Less commute? More creativity? Perhaps they wanted less stress? Whatever the reasons, they left a position that most would deem “successful” to avoid feeling a failure. Satisfaction was missing and a change was made.

Maybe you can relate to either end of this spectrum.

Ultimately, I wish you fulfillment while you succeed.

It’s comfort zones we need to avoid, isn’t it? When we desire something beyond the status quo we need to rise up and live completely, fully. This leads me to the next insight gained from Mr. Robbins when he was asked how he helps others overcome fear without experiencing the fire walk. He summarized it by addressing what motivates us.

Fear, Incentives, and Growth

There’s three types of motivation; fear, incentives and growth.

The most effective is growth.

Think about it, as a child you may have been threatened to wash the dishes or else a privilege would be revoked. The fear of losing a privilege created action. Dishes cleaned! It was the motivation we needed so we could play, watch cartoons, or watch movies at a friend’s house. This motivating fear was effective leverage. Long-term fear is not the best motivator, and yet clearly we understand that it can be practical.

Incentives provide a warm, fuzzy feeling type of motivation. I personally like incentives. As a kid I’d rush to make my bed just to hear the praises of my mother. As an adult, I’ve fallen in love with experiences and travel. I’ve been known to work harder for award trips to places like Bora Bora or Switzerland than earning an extra $400,000 (not that I am opposed to either).

When we discover what incentives motivate, we can support others in maximizing effectiveness in action. While incentives can be great for a season, there may come a time one is so saturated with “awards” like world travel that they hunger for something more, something deeper.

This type of motivation that drives us is growth! For the long-term and a deep sense of satisfaction, growth is considered the most effective motivation because it makes us FEEL ALIVE! I 100% whole-heartedly agree!

Don’t we feel the most alive when we can grow as a person and help others grow and transform their own lives?

It’s no wonder that great leaders are servants.

And those who are real standouts are sold out to the idea of serving others. They go beyond simple presentation of an idea or product. They want to leave the world a better place.

There you have it friends, insider wisdom from my lunch spent with Tony Robbins. I hope you find it beneficial. I know I did. Oh, by the way, I bet you are happier now, as you’ve made progress simply by reading this article. Celebrate it. And here’s to you having more fulfilling successes!

Join me in the conversation.

Share in the comments below what things most motivate you nowadays? Or dish out what progress you’ve made lately that brings happiness?

Work, Change & Higher Purpose

Change is good

Today more than ever, boundaries between work and higher purpose are merging. It’s where doing good really is good for business. I’m seeing this globally as well as personally. In this post, I’ll share some personal insights with you.

I’ve been conducting business since 1999. Throughout the years things have transformed, and certain themes remained constant, including health and wellness, making a difference while making money, and global living. Currently I’m shifting into a more refined way I can serve the world through teaching the joys of detox. I promise, it’s truly exciting!

Honesty and humble pie

It’s ownership and vulnerability all rolled into one. It’s humbling. At first I had decided I wouldn’t publicly address it- at all!

There’s no time for sympathy when pressing in for a victory.

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You see, I became “that” person in the health field who found herself wading through a healing crisis. Life can be such a teacher!

I’ve studied detoxification since my early twenties! In fact, I even wrote a short, light-hearted book about detox that many say has been helpful. Click here to download your free eBook.

I *know* how to stay healthy, yet somehow (I’ll spare you the details) the perfect storm hit taking me to my knees. I’ve learned that when we fall on our knees we’re in a prime position to look up and not give up. I prayed for perseverance.

Instead of feeling sorry for myself like I did some 15 years ago because doctors couldn’t agree on what autoimmune diseases I should be labeled with, I decided took the bull by the horns. Yes, I decided to ride it out in all it’s glory.

Something was different this time around. No self-pity. I have shifted so much that I can actually share this challenge with you freely. Deep down I know I am whole and I can walk through the fire. It’s the same way I deeply know I’m here to also help others walk through their fires.

We Aren’t Alone

We aren’t abandoned. We have magnificent tools to heal.

As the wellness entrepreneur who enjoyed incredible health and then all of a sudden was pounded with a tidal wave, I’ve learned that I’ve acquired skills. I rejoice in knowing how to overcome. “Knowing how” and “guiding myself and others” is a gift to the world.

One of my clients recently emailed me. She said her latest blood work was the best it’s ever been. Even her family was surprised with how well she was doing. This email brought immense satisfaction. It arrived on one of my darkest physical days and yet on my brightest day as a wellness entrepreneur. It was confirmation that I’m in the right work.

 Let’s shake up the fruit basket, shall we?

As an entrepreneur, I want lasting positive change. Often we want business and personal growth to show up as rainbows, unicorns and puppies. However an undesirable “shake up” can serve the world and ourselves the best. We can learn to trust the process, adapt and triumph.

Today, I can say I’m not exactly ready for an Ironman competition, but I am training for some long horse rides in South Dakota this September. This past weekend I rode in the mountains of Mexico three hours and later hiked up to a breath-taking view. It was worth having a sore butt and legs. Scouts honor.

Higher Purpose: Ain't no mountain high enough
Higher Purpose: Ain’t no mountain high enough

As I rode up the mountain, the pine trees reminded me that the Creator of the Universe loves me and nothing called Hashimoto’s or Addison’s disease will keep me down. Ever.

I know for certain, that if for some reason we aren’t instantaneously or supernaturally healed completely- We. Shall. Recover. And this my friends, is the hope and beauty of life.

Alert! I’ll be teaching more about detoxing, food and nutrition because it’s creating the biggest impact in those I serve. In our fast-paced world, there’s a place for taking care of our self whether we’re currently recovering or desire to stay well. Part of my mission is to help you live with more freedom and less toxins.

 Get your groove on

I’ve had an “old school” theme song playing through my mind this year. I believe it’s time to unleash it so we can get our groove on! While it’s meant to be a love song, may it motivate you to reach for better health, happiness, finances, relationships and more. Because when we’re truly intentional, “there ain’t no mountain high enough”.

Share with me in the comments below: do you have a theme song you’ve been jamming out to? Please post it! Or, tell me. Are you ready to clean up your body more with some friendly detoxing? I’d love to hear from you.

5 Reasons to Run From Being an Entrepreneur

Ever wondered if you’re headed down the right path? Should you embrace being an entrepreneur or completely run from the idea? Learn five reasons you may want to run (or not).

 

1- Approval from family and friends matters immensely.

Most of us live in a world where educational norms teach us to become employees. If we don’t descend from a line of successful entrepreneurs, we might hear something like this, “You’re aware that 95% of all businesses fail in the first five years, right?” Or “Honey, is this really what you’ve spent all those years in school for?”

 

Such words can leave anyone feeling unsupported and scratching their head. When we grasp that the world is made up of all kinds of gifted people we can choose to handle these challenges with greater finesse or devise an alternate route where we feel acceptance from our tight-knit circle.

 

Well-meaning people may not understand the entrepreneur’s quest tend to offer up opinions. So if you’re the type to plod on regardless of social approval, you have the makings of an entrepreneur. Carry on soldier! If not, keep your peace.

 

2- You want big results, like yesterday.

 

Big results require building a strong foundation in order to harvest long-term results. It can take time.

 

Less seasoned entrepreneurs have a learning curve in the game of business. The question is, when the cash isn’t overflowing in the first 3-6 months, will the effort continue? Will skills be mastered so that desired results can happen?

 

There’s a choice: are we willing to work for smaller rewards up front and postpone greater rewards for later? If so, you fit the bill for being an entrepreneur.

 

If waiting for something to come to fruition gnaws at your last nerve, ditch the idea of being an entrepreneur. Usually big results take time to generate. If you aren’t willing to put in the time and patience, you aren’t a terrible, no good person. You simply know your limits.

 

While entrepreneurship is open to anyone, it’s certainly not for everyone.

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3- You want to accomplish things ALL by yourself.

 

We all have things we like to do alone. It could be reading a good book, working out, or herding cats. How could I resist? I’m typing, alone and I self-entertain. 😉

 

When it comes to running a business entrepreneurs need to focus on doing what they do best. It’s downright crazy to build a business for the sake of maintaining control, saving money or “doing it right”.

 

Having control is an illusion. When growing a successful business it’s best to share the “control” with those who can save you time and sanity. I’m personally gushing with gratitude over my gifted CPA & Web Guru. By not doing it ALL by myself, more things get done! By actually spending money, I save more time. And, as an entrepreneur who relishes time freedom, this is a good thing!

 

Still hold fast to the thought of “if it’s going to be done right, then I’ll do it myself”? Then please, let go of the idea of being an entrepreneur. There’s a lot of good work that’s begging to be done in the world and it’s probably waiting for you.

 

4- You want others to do it ALL for you.

 

Being your own boss can sound glamorous or cool. And, it is most of the time. Just don’t be misled. Business is built on work. There’s no short cut. Successful entrepreneurs take inventory of where they want to go and design their work schedule around reaching this goal.

 

Naïve or wanna-be entrepreneurs often hold an entitlement attitude. They want results without really placing forth a diligent effort. Sometimes they blame others for their lack of results. In short, it’s victim mentality and it’s not pretty.

 

Successful entrepreneurs put their heads down and go to work. They don’t whine. They work. They bypass blame and take responsibility.

 

If you practice responsibility and take action, then being an entrepreneur suits you. If you’re quick to blame, not fond of work, or would rather play victim then run the other direction. Entrepreneurship will greatly disappoint you.

 

5- You think personal development is for sissies.

 

Being an entrepreneur can be likened to a salmon swimming upstream. Great entrepreneurs work to become personally resilient, and the strong survive. These entrepreneurs live in flux, flow and find their way by embracing personal development.

Being an entrepreneur is like salmon swimming upstream

In the past month I reached out to several entrepreneurs. I asked if they’d share about the kind of personal development they’re currently engaged in and how it’s contributing to their business game. Here’s a few responses.

 

“Dance lessons with my wife. It’s teaching me how to be a better leader. Often, my employees anticipate what’s next. I realize I’ve lacked clarity in how I lead. My wife keeps saying she’s willing to follow but the steps are confusing. Who knew having two left feet could provide such a business lesson while also entertaining her?”

 

“Toastmasters to polish up on my speaking skills and gain more contacts and confidence.”

 

“I mastermind with 4 others in my field. It’s amazing how quickly we’re growing business via a private online group and weekly call. My sales have doubled in the last quarter. There’s lots of giving and receiving.”

 

Do you spot the theme connecting all these responses? I see interaction, relationship, self-reflection and application.

 

Some people still don’t fathom how personal development applies to improving business. I’ve been told “it’s too uncomfortable, too vulnerable or a waste of time.” If this is you, being an entrepreneur probably isn’t your life calling and that’s okay. If you resonate with the concepts of life-long learning, moving through the poo, or continual improvement, then most likely you’ve been bitten by the entrepreneurial bug. There is no vaccination. 😉

 

I’d love to hear from you, where do you think you fit in? Will you be running from or embracing being an entrepreneur? Tell me about it in the comments below.

Good Grief! Mother’s Day is Coming!

When Grief Creates Growth

Mother’s Day is right around the corner. For years it’s been a usual time of grieving for me. Now it seems to have brought deeper personal growth. I invite you into a journey that’s turned into joy and more purpose.

A few months ago, I was asked to speak to a group of entrepreneurs on growing a solid business. After speaking, I opened the floor to questions. I chose not to hold anything back that could create value. Just as the first question hit, I thought perhaps I should run. Instead, my heart urged me to share. Deeply. Perhaps uncomfortably for some. It was cathartic just as much as the process of grieving had been.

I’ve always been an overcomer.

I’ve overcome being broke and weighing more than most high school football players. I’ve overcome university politics and autoimmune disease. Truth is, I’d overcome most everything but giving birth.

Through unsuccessful IVF treatments, I considered myself privileged to have had the option. Through several adoption fly-bys that went awry, the gnawing, unsatisfying, raw emotions plagued me; especially in May. On Mother’s Day I’d skip church so not to cry as beautiful, brave mothers would stand and be honored. On Mother’s Day I’d ask my supportive husband to wisk me away so I could cry unnoticed by my own mother, friends and family. You see, grief for a normally joyous person is like hell on earth.

This past January a gift came to my house.

She’s AnaKarla, the daughter of our friend, Jorge. She asked me to play a game. I agreed. I was supposed to think of a famous person and the computer would offer a range of yes or no questions to discover what famous person was on my mind. Albert Einstein. Check! First woman in Space, Sally Ride. Check! Latino Crooner, Luis Miguel. Check! Martin Luther King, Jr. Check! And then, there was Mother Theresa. What?! NO CHECK! She was deemed irrelevant because I refused to acknowledge her as childless. For indeed she was a great mother amongst children! This infuriated me! The computer game could not recognize her. #@!*&^:<@(*)`!!! How could a game revoke the “motherhood” of Mother Theresa? And there it was. Truth. The truth I had hungered for, and the first time I realized that the grief I had been holding onto truly needed to go! I was allowing it to stay when there was no further reason to grieve.

If I could allow Mother Theresa to be a mother, why could I not be a “mother”? It was time to reframe how I perceived myself.

About that time my husband, Daniel, and I were leaving on a 3 month sabbatical from the norm. We’d be living in Mexico. My plan was to expand the way I conduct business and work on becoming more “motherly”. I didn’t know how exactly it would all show up. I simply took steps, baby steps. I called up my trusted friend at Children’s Hunger Fund. I asked if we could get involved in their work in Mexico. Turns out there was no coverage in that area for orphanages or foster homes. The need became clear. Over the next 3 months I searched out, and worked with beautiful volunteers and organizations to address the needs of the children. It was life altering.

When I returned home, I received a greeting card.

I thought it to be an Anniversary card. It wasn’t. This card was different. It profoundly touched me. It was a Mother’s Day card. When I saw it, I began to sob uncontrollably. The remainder of the grief escaped as I began to understand how deeply my being as a person matters. To my parents. To children. And yes, the world! I finally agreed that I matter with or without bearing children. Breathe in. Breathe out. I matter and my work is life changing. The card simply read, “Happy Mother’s Day! It’s also for those special women who love with a mother’s heart. For the love, caring and kindness you bring to everyone blessed enough to be part of your life. (More tears, but tears of joy and relief, tears of being deeply loved and accepted.) It was signed, “We are so blessed by your life. We love you. Janny (my mom’s nickname) & Daddy” (because he’s still daddy to me). A day later, I received a text from my friend Sherry, “Happy Mother’s Day friend! You have the heart of a mother”. The wave of heavy grief lifted. I was ready to take on the world again!

Purpose.

Grief brings growth and a deeper sense of purpose. If we allow it. My work is more meaningful. I dare to dream big again, I dare to stay connected with the causes I know will “mother” children in need. And, I dare to be a working mother.

Goodbye tears- cuz ain’t nobody got time for that! Hello purpose! Deep soul-moving purpose. Purpose that surpasses sorrow. Purpose that lives to better tomorrow.

Here’s a picture of what moved me forward. These are some of the precious kids whose life journey pulled me from a pit of grief.

Grief brings growth and a deeper sense of purpose motherhood children

How about you? Ever left behind a deep grief into greater purpose? What moved you forward?

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